My coaching experience!

I had two clients today and one yesterday.I'd heard that the coach should help the coachee to see his/her issue in different perspective,the point was supporting the client to make the shift and not to push him/er to shift.
I experienced it today,when I ask my clients to tell two stories each one separately.My first client told his stories and I was W.A.I.T ing and then found the common behaviour which my client has showed and gave him that as a feedback.I said: what I heard was that you've done this same behaviour in facing those situations,tell me more.What kind of commitment made you to do that?
Helping him to reach out to his UAC(Underlying Automatic Commitment)and supporting him to choose how to support that UAC in order to make a positive shift.It was the aha moment for him.
A few hours later I received my second client call,I ask her the same question,having her to tell two stories.She told her stories but this time I CONCLUDED the common hidden behaviour showed by her in both stories.She agreed first and I thought I've helped her a lot but then,when I asked what did you take away from this session instead of what I expected,she said nothing much.
I think she'd not reached the point that I'd reached,maybe I was not able to supporting her to touch her UAC.Maybe my conclusion was like a judgement and it was not helpful for her,maybe she got aware of her UAC but not willing to let it go.What if I just mirroring what I'd seen in her stories,did I receive a reply like I'm now more clear on my issues in this session instead of I got nothing?
It was a good experience to get in touch with the philosophy of coaching.What do you take away from my experience?what's your perspective around it?

What trust brings to your life?

When it comes to trust,mostly we think of a broad range of reliability to someone or something which itself comes from a strong background of cognition and it never comes without it.
We are naturally looking for information showing that the reliability to the special thing is for sure,so when there are not those information there's no trust!!!
But what exactly trust can bring to our lives?
What contexts need to be trusted?
When you are struggling with an special issue,how trust will work?
Trust to what by the way?
Trust to :what's happening is perfect regardless of what it is;
When you trust,you feel secure,confident,joy,....
To trust means: everything that has happened includes an important lesson ,it's a part of the journey of life,to trust means acceptance and letting go,it means gain.
Imagine yourself in the situation when you're not sure of what's going on,what makes you overwhelmed?what makes you confident?
What does stop you from trusting?Is that what you are judging?
Where does all of our concerns come from?

Mind Mapping and Coaching

I had a session with a client who had so many ideas in her mind,different issues and concerns,she spoke a lot and I just listened.

listened and listened until she said:"You see I am totally distracted and overwhelmed,what should I do?I don't know how to make things work!to what extend focus on these concerns,these issues,they've lied in different contexts......!!!!"

And then she stopped talking.....

I W.A.I.T.E d for a while,then she continued:"I've been in these kinds of situations in different times and parts of my life and just passing the time has helped me to deal with them by now!"

Then there was a silence........I asked:"Is there anything else you want to share?"

She said:"No that's all".

I said:"Let me think"......What do you think about doing an exercise right now?

She said:"Please go ahead".

I asked:"Please bring a paper and a pen".

She said:"done".

I asked:"Please write down your major issue which is common in all of the issues your struggling".

1. Draw a circle around it


2. Write down your different issues around the circle and connect them by some lines to that circle


3. Now describe a bit about each one briefly,just with the simple words,the description involves the answers to some Wh questions,like:Why?Where?When ?What?Who? and also a How?


4. Add to them your ideas ,solutions that come up in your mind

Please give an appropriate label according to above stages,I mean 1~4

One more thing,REMEMBER TO MARK YOUR PRIORITIES IN THIS MAP WITH DIFFERENT COLORS.".

Guess what!!!!

She took a big silence so that I thought we've lost the connection......suddenly she said:"That's wonderful,I love this tool I found how to organize my mind".

The tool is called:MIND MAPPING

On the right side of this post you can find a simple example of a MIND MAP.

What do you think about this tool?When do you think we can use it?